Thursday, January 15, 2009

The closed doors


If you have ever looked into adoption you have had to deal with some closed doors. Juergen has not given the green light for another adoption, but I'm looking anyway. So far I've gotten a few doors shut in my face. Because we live in Germany everything is harder anyway. I looked at some kids living in the USA. So far the kids I've found need to be adopted close to where they live. This is so they can stay in contact with their families (biological grandparents, brothers and sisters). I looked at China. I can know longer adopt from China because of the Hague rules. I would need a I800A and you can not get that living in Germany. I looked at a 6 year old girl waiting in Ethiopia. I've been told I can adopt from Ethiopia as an American living abroad but the agency will not work with Americans living abroad. All of this does not discourage me. For one thing, Juergen has not said yes yet. For another thing, every closed door just narrows the path. If there is a path that leads to a waiting child then I will find that path. If it's God's will then the one door that leads to my child will stay wide open. I don't believe I could adopt just anyone...I believe there is one child already hand picked to fit into our crazy family. I am crazy enough to look for that one child who waits behind the one door and God holds the key to that door. If you have been waiting for a long time please do not be discouraged. Every closed door directs you to the right child, the one you were made to call your own! I'll probably be waiting for awhile. It will take time (I think) before Juergen is ready for one more adoption. Maybe he will never be ready and that will be a door closed forever. I have to accept that. I'm OK with looking. I may find your next child, and my looking could help you. For me that is great. I know waiting kids I've posted on this blog found their families. I am so blessed to have some how helpped them find a home. But I am looking for my next child. I'm praying for that open door. Jesus said "ask and you will recieve, seek and you shall find". I believe I will find the right door if I keep looking. That probably makes my poor husband crazy.